Not only were the creators of this show allowed to keep their lives, but in an act that could only be described as a crime against humanity, this beast was allowed to mutate into other abominations. Fear Factor emerged as the cross breeding of "Survivor" and "The Price is Right" where the producers decided to drop the pretence that the participants were eating maggots out of necessity and decided to acknowledge the fact that it was all for greed. Fear Factor does have it's shining moments however. Periodically there's a Celebrity Fear Factor and you get to watch three B Rated Celebrities that were too stupid to appear on Jeopardy drink albatross bile out of a gym shoe.

The next illegitimate child of Survivor was "The Chamber". All this show consisted of was a chair in which someone sat in while alternating blasts of fire and cold water were shot at them. Then some guy would ask them incredibly easy questions and they got points or money or herpes for however many they would get right. If there were some permanent scarring or permanent fatalities took place during the course of the show, it may have been worth watching. I haven't seen this show advertised in quite a while so I think it was taken off the air. Either that or it was moved to the coveted 4 AM time slot. Evidently it wasn't making enough income to finance the technicians that operated "The Chamber". They discovered that the standard Hollywood studio staff of illegal Mexican immigrants weren't well suited for ensuring the safety of the contestants. Burn Gringo, Burn.

What makes the situation worse is that once the seal on the reality TV pit was broken it allowed other horrible shows to spawn forth and begin to further reek havoc on the American populous. I wasn't sure what the most horrid beast this portal of damned contained but, I thought that I'd seen the worst of it with "The Bachelor". An elongated version of the dating game is a concept that could only be conceived by Satan himself. Lets create a TV series that pits a fleet of romantically inept women against one romantically inept man, reality will ensue! However, the "reality" of this show only seemed as realistic as having a hemorrhoid the size of Mario Van Peebles head. While "the bachelor" was handing out roses to the contestants I felt like I was giving birth seven dozen with long stems.

Now that The Bachelor has feasted upon the brains of it's loyal viewers and left them lobotomized and drooling in their recliners the beast turned around to show it's other gruesome head. The other persona of this dual headed monster is known as "The Bachelorette" and I'm sure it's going to reek even more havoc than the last. For this new season stars the bitch that was rejected by the bachelor from last season for being too stupid, ugly, fat, fridged, decrepit, dirty, impotent, bald, mutated, crusty, dried up and diseased.

After a season of feeding on the brains of the American "The Bachelor" had to take a crap. This colossal dump was named "Joe Millionaire". This show revolved around a bunch of ditsy bimbos competing for the love of some millionaire steroid jacked misanthrope. The twist is that he was in real life Joe made barely enough money to support his various nefarious drug habits. I'm not sure what ever happened in the last episode when Joe told the bitch they'd be living in a trailer park, but I hope she shot him in the face.

Just when I thought that the bottom of the barrel had been scrapped dry, along came "American Idol" with their industrial drilling equipment so they could explore the horrors of lies under the barrel itself. The very existence of American Idol basically negates the possibility that there is a god. If there was any divine justice the unholy union between reality TV and pop music surely would not have been allowed. There would have been some divine intervention on that fateful day deep in the bowels of the Earth as the marketing minions of Satan plotted how to best combine the two worst aspects of American culture. The only thing that could make this program even interesting in the slightest bit is the English cock sucker they hired to be an asshole to all the contestants. The fact that this douche bag even thinks that pop can be called music pretty much assures that he couldn't recognize musical talent even if he was being sodomized by Beethoven's hearing aid.

So until the government finally steps in and exorcise these demons back into the pit from which they sprang we will continue to be plagued by this programming of the damned. At some point there must be some intervention because governments have been overthrown for less. Round up the actors, contestants and directors and toss them in a prison camp. Their time can be better spent digging ditches and then filling them back in instead of subjecting us to the horrors of reality TV. Then they can televise it and call it "Survivor Forced Labor Camp", which is something everyone can enjoy.